Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Taking Offense

Socrates taught that ’Man always chooses what he believes to be the good’, and yet, so many of us tend to be of the belief that the world is against us.
People are always well intentioned insofar as their awareness is capable of letting them believe that their intentions are meant for good. Even if the actions don’t necessarily reflect the highest good, the truth is that every person would do things in a manner that didn’t offend or upset anyone if he had the means to.
We tend to justify everything in the moment, even if only to regret it in the next (e.g. I know that hitting people is wrong, but in this instant it’s justified because I’m angry).
Now having realized all this, it’s important to examine the spirit of the intention behind people’s actions.
For example, a mother might resist letting go of a child…letting her make her own descisions. However irrational it may appear to the girl, the truth is that the mother does it because she wants her child to be safe. She does it because she cares.
The issue at hand isn’t an opposition of wills, but simply an intellectual difference in awareness that can be resolved when either party makes an effort to appeal to the intention behind the other’s actions.
Taking offense merely perpetuates the unresolvedness of the situation.
Of course then, we must also make the effort not to take offense at others who take offense at things. In fact, we shouldn’t even be offended when we catch ourselves taking offense at things. Being patient with our own offendedness is a great place to start addressing it all. We don’t do well to beat ourselves up over it. Acceptance is the key to transcendence…in non-resistance we don’t inflate frustrations so that they have an easier time in persisting. Instead, we let frustration run it’s course until it simply lets go. After some residual manifesting of whatever propensities we’re trying to overcome, generally we can kiss them goodbye with confidence that we won’t fall victim to them again.

As a friend pointed out in a discussion that we had months ago about taking offense, the Socrates quote seems to be echoed in Jesus when he says ’Forgive them Father for they know not what they do’. Talk about not taking offense!

Another interesting point that another friend brought up was the distinction that can be made between responding and reacting. She also went on to note that ‘People are doing their very, very best, even when clearly they are not. When you look at life this way, compassion, empathy, forgiveness and respect are the norm.’

Anyhow, it’s all food for thought.
Have a peaceful day,

-Rob

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